Togetherness

Long before I had kids, I pictured myself traveling with them and taking them out to eat all the time. I pictured us in a cafe for breakfast. One kid in a high chair, sitting quietly, while another kid sat in the booth also sitting quietly. We’d converse at a normal volume, eat our eggs and croissants like civilized people, laugh occasionally, and leave without a mess.

Now, I laugh at how unrealistic my vision was.

These days, taking the baby anywhere is a chore. Eating at restaurants results in food all over the booth and floor. Both kids are restless and eager to run around. They’re usually yelling. When the food arrives, Steve scarfs down his meal while I hold G and then we switch. We leave feeling fed but not relaxed in any way.

And yet, going out just the four of us has become one of my favorite things to do. Yes, it’s more work to get us all out of the house. Yes, I still struggle with some anxiety leaving the house. But, I tell myself the pros outweigh the cons. The more we practice getting out, the easier I find it. And, I am loving our adventures together. Whether it’s our regular routine of the library, the bookstore, and Trader Joe’s or exploring something new, I look forward to experiencing life. Together.

Photos by Mo ♥️

Bye Bye, Bay

Dear California,

My husband, pup, and I embarked on a new adventure in 2018. We didn’t know what you would have in store but we were ready for something new.

You showed me the beauty that is Mother Nature. I gazed in awe at the mammoth trees in Tahoe, the cliffs in Carmel, and the coast along the 101. In an hour, we went from the grimy city to the pristine shores of Point Reyes.

You also showed me firsthand that Mother Nature is suffering and that climate change is more powerful than ever. I breathed in the toxic air of wildfires, saw the plastic pollution in the ocean, and cried about whether we could reverse the devastation.

You gave me new friends, amazing souls I love and can’t wait to see again. In a new place, we were welcomed with open arms and soon, California began to feel like home. For that, I am forever grateful.

I didn’t understand California cuisine for the longest time. I get it now. Thank you, Berkeley, for opening my eyes to the fruit we can grow in our yards (as small as the yards may be). From lemons to loquats, we saw homes that utilized all of the space they were given. Thank you, Berkeley Bowl, for the cornucopia of fresh produce and making it always available. Thank you, Chez Panisse, for showing me that simple meals with fresh quality ingredients are metaphors for life.

I’ll miss the smell of the Redwoods, the closeness of hiking trails, and the plethora of Asian food. I’ll miss how the winters felt like fall, deceiving me into thinking no time had passed at all.

And what a trick it was. Suddenly, two years passed. Our marriage strengthened each weekend as we went on long hikes and drives to the coast, or when we simply relaxed at home. We finally had time to ourselves. We fought less, loved more, and only had each other to lean on. We spent weekends looking for adventure instead of worrying about obligations. California, in a way, was one long, bonus honeymoon. And we left the Bay with the ultimate culmination, our very own bay-bay.

Thank you for a chapter in my life I will look back on fondly,

Linda

My Heart Swings

Leaving Chicago has been something I've wanted for a while. Now that it's finally time to leave, I'm feeling incredibly sad. Chicago is my home and comfort zone. I'll miss my daily routine in Wicker Park, the familiarness of Chinatown, the streets and highways I've been driving down since I was a kid. But most of all, I'll miss my friends and family. My grandpa turns 97 this year, and my parents aren't getting any younger.

I feel grateful to call Chicago home. It's the city that taught me to be kind and practical, to be humble yet proud. It's where I learned a strong work ethic and where I learned to enjoy the simple things in life. You can take the girl out of the Midwest, but you can never take the Midwest out of the girl.

All my life, I've been torn between wanting to see the world and wanting to stay home. My heart swings hopelessly between a need for routine and the urge to run wild. I love traveling but deep down, I'm a homebody. 

It's as if I have two modes in life:

1. Adventure-seeking
2. Couch-potato

Now feels like the right time to be adventure-seeking. Steve and I don't have kids yet, and we're in a place professionally where we can make a change. Though we know adventure is out there and a new chapter of our lives awaits us, it's still hard to leave and we'll miss Chicago dearly.